Nuahcerpel 2

When I returned home, I found that my worst fears had been realized.
"M'lad! How couldja let one o' these, these things in here! Were ya that desperate to be rid o' me?"
"My good man! However could you have neglected to warn me about the presence of this creature in your home?"
The nuahcerpel and the leprechaun were locked in some kind of wrestling hold, with the leprechaun trying to bite Lord Godfry, who was holding the leprechaun's head at bay with his arm.
"I, uh, I..." I stammered.
"Well, don't just stand there, do something!" the taller, red clad creature yelled.
"If I could get rid of him, I would have, but..."
At this point something happened very fast. I'm not sure how, but somehow the nuahcerpel got the better of the leprechaun who, quickly realizing he was beaten, promptly vanished. The remaining man got up and dusted off his red overcoat.
"He'll be back," he said, "This is troublesome indeed. He'll be back and he'll bring an army. I am going to need backup."
"Backup?"
"Yes. Though I had hoped to hide out here to get away from this tiresome struggle, I'm afraid that's no longer possible. So, instead, the rest of my family will be here first thing tomorrow morning. We'll be ready when the leprechauns arrive."
"How many people are we talking about here?"
"No more than 15, I should think."
15? I could never handle 15 more people. I struggled to think of an excuse.
"Is there any way you could stay somewhere else."
"I'm afraid not, my friend. The battleground will be here. If only you had told me. Now I must go and prepare."
And he promptly vanished. I was getting very tired of vanishing, but I knew at this point it was my turn. I grabbed my suitcase (still packed from Ireland) and began repacking it with anything I didn't want damaged. If my house was to be a battleground for Yriaf and Fairy folk, I wanted to protect as much of my stuff as possible. Appropriately enough for the mood, thunder crashed ominously as a rainstorm began outside my window. I began to wonder what the battle would entail. I doubted it would just be wrestling. Surely there was weaponry that the magically inclined used. My questions were answered when Lord Godfry came down the stairs with a sword and shield.
"You'll want to take these. I assume you'll be fighting for our side tomorrow?"
"Fighting?"
"Well, you're not just going to stand around are you? I know you only agreed to let me stay, but this is war."
"Lord Godfry, your beef is with the leprechauns, not mine. I'm not going to be a part of your battle. Tomorrow morning I'm leaving the house for a few days. When I come back, I expect this all sorted out."
Lord Godfry looked at me with a hard stare until he finally spoke.
"Go well friend. I hope for your sake we are victorious, because if the leprechauns win they won't leave your home. Goodnight."
I tried to sleep that night but there were popping noises all through the night as Nuahcerpels popped into my house. Several of them showed up in my room, mumbled apologies and walked out. Even the calming sounds of the storm failed to help me sleep.
The next morning I bid Lord Godfry goodbye and left. As I drove off I saw a short green army approach my house from the other direction. I looked forward instead. The rain had stopped and had left behind a near-perfect rainbow. I thought of the research I'd done on leprechauns. If they're all at my house, I thought, then who's...? Aw, what the hell. I drove as fast as I could toward the end of the rainbow. When the road was no longer useful I got out of my car and ran. The rainbow was fading, but the end was in sight. I knew logically this was impossible, yet there it was! And sitting there, at the end of the rainbow, was an unprotected pot of gold.
I picked up the pot of gold and slowly made my way to my car, then I drove to my brother's house, where I'd been planning to stay anyway. Once there, I switched the contents of my suitcase and the pot of gold and took my pot of stuff inside.
"Dave!," I yelled, "I need you to look after this for a while!"
I didn't wait for an answer. Slamming the suitcase of gold shut, I sped off toward my house.
The scene there was terrifying. The battle had not begun. Instead the Leprechauns and Nuahcerpels were lined up on either wall, completely decked out with weapons and armaments.
When I walked in, all eyes went to me. I held up a single gold coin.
"If any of you want to see the rest of this again," I said to the leprechauns, "You'll all get the hell out of my house before I get to ten. 1..."
The leprechauns stood, staring at me.
"2..."
They looked from side to side nervously.
"3...4..."
They began to run. The leprechauns were on my yard by 6.
And from there there's not much to tell. I gave the leprechauns their gold, and they said I could keep the pot. They've still got my suitcase. The nuahcerpels decided just to go home. Ultimately it was one of the strangest experiences of my life.

Nuahcerpel

Jonah: Thomas I want to write but I don't much feel like working on one of my stories. I need a prompt.
Thomas: You're lost in Northern Iresland
Thomas: A man wearing all red approaches you
Thomas: go from there

I guess I probably should never have gone to Ireland in the first place. I don't know what I expected to find. Little green men hiding their pots of gold behind rainbows? Well, yes. That was what I was hoping for I admit. But any insight into the origin of the mysterious fellow who'd turned up in my pantry last St. Patrick's Day would have been helpful.
The fact is that I did go to Ireland, and now I was lost. Not just "which way do I turn?" lost but "am I actually still in Ireland?" lost. I'd been walking through the hills all day and though they were very picturesque I was getting hungry and tired and desperately hoping for some sign of civilization.
That was when he found me. A man approached me, dressed in the garb of an 19th century gentleman in a full vest and tails (but without the top hat) all in varying (but complimentary) colors of red. He was tall and lanky and had straight black hair, with a clean shaven face and round ears.
"Hello, sir," he said in a rich British accent, "You look to be a tad lost."
"More than a tad," I admitted greatfully, "Could you perhaps tell me how to get home?"
"I could indeed, dear sir, but nothing in this world is without a price. I myself have run into a spot of trouble around here and need a far away place to stay for a spell. Since you look to be a foreigner (an American I daresay) I wonder if you might offer your home?"
Well that certianly was not the fee I had expected, but in many ways I was gratified. After all, I had an extra room since Amelia left, and I wouldn't mind having a guest to take my mind off things. And of course, I thought, he might be some help with the Leprechaun problem. So I agreed.
The man (who introduced himself as Lord John Godfry) showed me that I was not, in fact, very far from a small Irish town where we stayed the night, agreeing to head to the airport in the morning. Oddly enough, this proved unneccessary as I woke up the next morning in my own bed. Confused, I walked downstairs to my kitchen where I discovered Lord Godfry still dressed as before and eating a bowl of Captian Crunch.
"I hope you don't mind," he said between bites, "But I'm not terribly fond of those airplanes so I got us home in my own way, which was after all a tad faster."
"But," I asked incredulously, "How did you -"
"Well, I suppose I should fess up. There are some things I kept from you before my boy. I have a few slgihtly unnormal abilities on account of being, as they say, one of the Yriaf folk."
"The Yriaf folk?"
"Yes, Yriafs, Fles, Ixips, Emongs, and, like myself, the Nuahcerpels."
I was very confused of course. I had never heard of any of these things, so I said so.
"I thought that might be the case," he replied, "Well, have you heard of the Fairy folk?"
"A little bit. Elves and that sort of thing?"
"Exactly. We are the counterbalancing force to the fairy folk - we're just as magical, but we're as different as night and day, and we tend to be on not-very-good terms with them. My people, for instance are the sworn enemies of the leprechauns. That's why I needed to hide out here. There certianly won't be any leprechauns around here. Anyway, it's only for a few days."
Having finished his cereal, he got up to put the box back in the pantry. I stood up.
"Let me get that for you," I said, "You are my guest after all." Taking the Captian Crunch back to the pantry, I found inside the one creature I had least hoped to encounter.
"That's a decent cereal, m'lad, but are ya sure don't want to try some Lucky Charms?"
"If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times. I don't like Lucky Charms. Now I need to talk to you. You really need to leave my house."
"You jist want me to leave so ye can follow me to me pot o' gold, but I won't be havin' with it. I'm stayin'."
"I have already removed all the beer and Lucky Charms from the house; I know you're here, and you've ceased to be anything more than an annoyance. Why are you still here?"
At that point, as I knew he would, he smiled mischieviously and disappeared. It was just then that Lord Godfry appeared behind me.
"Whoever were you talking to in here?" he asked.
"I talk to myself, when I'm trying to decide on breakfast," I lied quickly, "It's an old habit."
"I see. Well, I'm going to go check out the sights of the city, I'll likely be back around 11 for tea."
"Can't say I have tea."
"Well, I'll pick some of that up too then. Ta-ta."
And he was off. I supposed he was going to get the money out of the box of silver at the begining of the, of the, whatever the opposite of a rainbow is. It didn't matter. The fact was that I had a problem. Two sworn enemies living in my house, one whom I was honor-bound to harbor and the other that I simply couldn't get rid of. I would have to take care of this somehow. At least work thought I was still in Ireland so I had a few days off. I went to the library and, not surprisingly, found no information about Nuahcerpels. I did do some more research on leprechauns and found nothing especially helpful. At 11:30 I decided to head home.

I definitely promised myself I wouldn't start anything new, so I'm terribly sorry about this. It just sort of happened and I'm not ready to finish it yet.