TNT: Chapter 1 continued

Five minutes later, Vlad walked in. Vlad was a heavy-set norwegian man with dark blonde hair and a bushy mustache. He had a big grin on his face. He spoke in a deep voice as he extended his hand for a handshake. It was a bone-cruncher.
"Name's Vladimir," he said, "But you can call me Vlad. I'm the anthropro- antherpor- the new toaster soul guy."
"Eric Smellick."
"So, what are we looking for today? A vicious guard toaster? A generally nice but prone to fits of toast-burning anger toaster? Maybe a timid, ineffective one?"
"I'm just looking for a respectful, obedient toaster," Eric cheerfully replied.
Vlad's grin fell. "I was afraid you'd say that. I'm afraid we don't have any of those."
"Why not!?!" Eric asked, incredulous.
"As far as I know, there are none. Toasters just aren't that kind."
"I refuse to accept that! There are good toasters, there must be! Toasters were created to serve us, and somewhere, some toaster must do that! If you don't don't have it, I'll look elsewhere. I'll search unto the ends of the earth! Mark my words, Vladimir, I will find this toaster."
Immediately Vlad fell to the ground in awe. "Such fire! Such passion! I will follow you, Eric Smellick, on your quest for the perfect toaster, and together we shall find it!"
And they set out.
"Wait a minute. Don't you work here?" asked Eric.
Vlad walked back into the store. "Jack, I'm going on a quest cover for me!"
And they set out for real.